Thursday, November 27, 2014

5.5 Years With My Dearest IPG Besties!

Without realizing, my 5.5 years with IPG has really really really come to an end. I have achieved what I aimed for. I have finished what I was supposed to finish. It has reach the ending point and there is no way for us to turn back time and repeat what we wish we had done before this. I still remember when I first came to KK, I felt like finishing the course as soon as possible. I just can't wait to get it all done and go back to where I belong.

Honestly, I didn't really like the place and also didn't manage to get along well with the people there. That was in the first semester. The feeling of going back home was ever strong as time pass by. I just can't wait to go home as soon as the school holiday arrive. I feel like I was being put in a cage whenever I stay there. But then, something change as time pass by. I have started to form a bond between my beloved classmates, friends in IPG, churches friends, travelling companions, Chelsea supporters group and etc. 

Anyway, today I would like to highlight my closest friends in this 5.5 years of studies in IPG. We are known by the name of JOJ! 11 members one heart, one objective which is to be able to be compliment to each other. They are Icha, Kinah, Pajan, Ichum, July, Wandi, Juing, Afiq, Lv, Marsi and me myself. We have went through a lot all these years. All the ups and downs. We even fought and quarrel with each other before this. But in the end, we make up after all. We are one family. 

All those trips to Kundasang, Kudat, Kota Belud, Tawau and dinner after dinner are all gonna be our sweetest memories from now on. We all know that time can never return to how it used to be. What we can do is just reminisce what we have done through all the pictures taken. We can think back all the happiness and sadness all those while. We are all humans and have feelings towards each others. I cannot deny that there are some which indeed change me a lot along the way. They gave me advice and have always been great listeners.

I have been thinking back of the things and events we have gone through all these while for the past few weeks. For the first time in my life, I feel like not going back to my hometown as soon as the exams ended. And I knew that it was the right choice. I went for the final trip with my dearest friends which will always remain as my sweetest memories in my life. We also send our friends to the airport when they finally decided to go back to their hometown and this time they don't need to buy a return ticket back to KK. 

I admit that I am a very emotional person and yeah, I cried for my friends. I will miss their presence in their and I may never have the chance to meet them anymore after this. Who knows. Weep after weep and in the end, it's my turn to go back today. I thought I could hold onto myself but in the end I gave in after all. My friends just meant a lot to me and I love every single one of them! Thanks to all of my JOJ friends for your moments and time we spend together. Sorry if I have made you all angry and if there are some wrongdoings of mine which hurt you all. I hope that we can meet again next time. More posts to come after this! Have a nice day people!^^

Tuesday, November 11, 2014

10 Days Encounting. Oh Dear Friends!

Now we are down to the final 10 days. First paper of the semester is done and dusted. Nothing can be done to change the fact that I didn't do so well in it. Nonetheless, I still feel quite positive in it! Thanks God for that! 2 more papers to strive before we finish this final exam of degree life! I just hope that I can have the feel and encouragement to study now. It just feel so weird when I just think of how fast time can be when everything is about to come to an end. 

Before it ends, I still have an action research book to rush for. Finally receive some positive comments from my lecturer today. I just need to show him for one last time before I print the real thing! 3 sets of action research book, the work for 5.5 years. Without it, I will never be able to graduate. And it's something which I make, did everything myself. Thanks God again for guiding me all along the way.

After everything come to the full stop in this institute, I need to think of when I am actually gonna go back to my hometown. The thing is I have no idea so far when n how am I actually gonna pack so many things of mine back to my hometown. So many memories created here. I can't bring every single one of them back. I need to pick and choose. Gonna start packing soon. Time flies like swift wind.

I still remember how I wish to be back at home the first thing holiday came. I would usually be the first one reporting to the airport and be so anxious of going back home the day before. One fact, I have Never miss a holiday back at home. I just wanna be back home and be the happiest guy on earth when I reach home!

But now, everything has gone so different. I actually doesn't have that anxious feeling of going back though I know holiday is reaching near me. Maybe this is the last time I will be here. Who knows. God has His plans for every single one of us. I do miss my family members a lot but now I just wanna spend more time with my friends here. When are we gonna spend time as 21 members of maths maniac again? No one knows that answer for sure.

All in all, what I want to say is appreciate every single one of your friends you have now. The next time you see him or her may be after 10 or 20 years later. With the family members of them along them. Spend more time with them, reminisce every happy or sad moment. Celebrate the farewell, take more pictures! We all know Who's important for us. Say what you wanna say and Never regret when everything is too little too late. Well, 10 more days dear friends!

Friday, November 7, 2014

What's Done, Is Done!

People keep on asking, we keep on denying. People do this, we do that. Why do we keep on avoiding the truths all the time? Why must there be so many hypocrite surrounding us all? These are some questions for us to ponder for some moment today. We have chances to do the right thing yet we gave up that chance and instead did something else which is not as good. Weird or not, you tell me!

I know I am not perfect and I will never be one perfect person. No one is perfect in this world other than the high above God of ours. Who can say no to that? I do make mistake and all I wanted is just a chance to say sorry. I wish I can make it up to you before it's really too little too late. But will you ever respond to my apology? Do I deserve a second chance, you will judge.

Standing where I am today doesn't mean that I must be proud all the time. There are always time for us to look back and reflect what has been done all along the years. The road we chose, the places we have been and the choices we have made which brought us all here today. Who to blame if the happiness is not enough for all of us? Who to find in telling our stories? Deep down in our heart, we know the answer! Never say No!

I am a realistic person and surely I know I cannot turn back time. Once hurt is caused, the pain shall always remain there. Even if you say a thousand times sorry also mean no point at all. So if you really want to remain suffering and doesn't wanna let go of it, I can Never stop you. You have made your choice, so I shall respect your choice. I can only say all the best for your future life from afar. May God bless you all the time and I wonder if we will ever say Hi to each other next time when we meet on the street!

Thursday, November 6, 2014

The Remaining Time For Allen!

Well... so now we are into the month of November! The final two months of the year 2014, the year which I will graduate for this teaching institute! Been through a lot lately to reach here. So now roughly we have around 15 more days to go before everything here become memories for the rest of our life. We can Never turn back time as we moves on in our life. 

We are who we are and others shall always remain as others to us. For this final semester here, a lot has been done till this moment where I am left with an action research book to bind and 3 exam papers to cover. Done my internship, cover all the assignments, presented my action research and most lately done with my spp interview. I am really grateful to God that all of them have been gone through marvelously. So far so good and I am really happy that they are all over. 

However, now I have a really weird feeling deep inside my heart. I am scare of reaching the end that early. I am not sure if I am prepare to be a real teacher and teach my students in the real school. Can I really do it? And I am really gonna miss my best friends I have here in KK. I have a feeling I will cry so hard on the day I fly away from here for good. Not a good feeling and there will surely be a lot of people, things, food and etc which I am gonna miss here. 

Indeed, I have known a lot people here for all these years. However, like what my friends have said the other day, there are many level of friends. Let me put it like this, I have a lot of friends but some will always just be acquaintance, some are my normal friends or shall i say classmates, some are my best friends and some are my most trusted and most important friends. I care for every single of my friends out there and will be deeply hurt too in case my friends got hurt too. So, please never hurt my friends.

Anyway, with this I would like to sincerely apologize to all of you out there who has been hurt by me directly of indirectly. I can only say that I am really sorry for what I have done all these years and if there's chance, I shall treat you to a meal or two to make it up to you. Not much time left for all of us here. In another 2 weeks time, it's the time to say bye bye to everybody. Never leave a place with regret as life is never too long to live in regrets!

Monday, October 20, 2014

How Complicated Can Humans Be

One thing I could not understand the most is how complicated humans can be at time. They just could not put down as easily as it seems at times. People can be put together in one place for 5.5 years and still act like strangers. Maybe it's true that one mountain can only have one tiger. There can never be two or three tiger being the head of that particular mountain. Not everyone can be a leader. That's why we need to compliment each other and build a successful relationship between each of us.

To be honest, I do still think if I have actually made the right decision on my profession or the path for my career all this while. I know it's like it's near the end of my study life for the teaching course yet I do still think as if I still have the choice. If I had the chance to return to the past and make a choice once more, will I make the same decision? Oh well, I shall keep the answer to myself for now.

Seeing all the scenarios happening surrounding day by day, I have indeed learn a lot. I know who are friends, who are acquaintance and who are just nobody to me. I shall appreciate all those who are friends to me and spend my time wisely with them by my side whenever I have the chance. For those acquaintance, thanks for having you in my life but you are just an acquaintance and always will be one. With limited time left, sorry to say this but I have my own life. Do not bother ruin mine and I shall not ruin yours either. Now to the nobody, you can continue being negative there all day long. But please don't you ever dare influence me. I am a positive thinker and I live a positive life. I believe that everything happen for a reason. No one hate you for nothing. There must be a reason and can you please just be more aware of it and not be a nuisance.
What can I say about this. 5.5 years can be short to someone and can also be quite long to the others. You will have to face each others for half a decade. Day in day out, the same people all along. With the limited time left, please do use the leftover time wisely and not waste it in some hating business. You hate me and I hate you, in the end what do we get? Unhappiness! Try to think of the way in making ourselves happy and be good to the surrounding people. The world needs you to be a better teacher for our next generation! All the best guys and gals.

Saturday, October 18, 2014

Friendship Built As Years Passed By!

Last night while I was in the plane, I actually have some sudden thoughts as listed below:

Suddenly I have the feeling of missing my classmates who have been through so much with me for the last 5.5 years. I really wanted the days to pass by as soon as possible at first. But now here I am starting to think how would life be when I they are no longer studying together with me next year. As days pass by without us realizing, we really should enjoy and appreciate every moment we can cherish with them. 

Never feel regret for not being able to use the time we have in the best possible way. Try to think back or reflect what activities we have gone through, whatever hard works, pain and gain, happiness we shared, the fighting n quarreling, the tension created and so on. There are deem to be a lot of unforgettable memories along this way. Some places we went together or some choices which we made together. 

Whatever been done or things undone along this few years, we can never rewind back to the past! We can only recall and smile as years pass by like a video. We shall always put each others in deep mind in years to come. Reminiscent by reminiscent to come. They say degree life is the best part of our life where we are most free to do all the best things in our life. I have so many friends along this wonderful degree life. 

I have some traveling friends where we have been to west Malaysia, east Malaysia and we even went to the overseas, Taiwan! I miss all those trips and I really hope that our trips won't just end there. Indeed, I really want to travel with you all once more when we are on our working journey coming soon next year. 

Other than that, I also have a bunch of wonderful church friends! There are the people who went to the church and went through the church activities with me so so often in the church. I can see that all of us has learned many new things and has indeed grown spiritually with God's guidance to all us. With this, I really thanks God for granting me so many friends along this journey of my 5.5 years of foundation and degree life! A teacher to be is gonna be born soon! Have a nice day everybody!

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Final 38 Days! Come on Allen!

It's been a while since I last visited here. Been through a lot of hustle and bustle of this final semester life. So now I am back here as soon as I have finish handing in all my assignments for this degree life, action research done ready to be checked and so on. With not much time left here in sabah, indeed I will have lots of things to miss.

This is the final week of our class and next week we are into our first week of study week where I will spend my time at my home! Exams starts on the 10th of November, follow by 13th n ends on 17th. My interview will be either before the exam period or after it. Honestly, I would rather have it early and need not think of it anymore once it's all over.

Now to the class which I have been in for the last 5.5 years. Sadly to say, it's gonna be the end soon. In 38 days time, everything will be just another part of history for me. Went through all sorts of stuff and indeed a lot of memories created in between! To be frankly, I have actually forgotten most of the things which happen before and can only keep the happiest moments in my mind!

There are a lot of people surrounding all of us. Some good, some bad. Some are what we call pretenders. What I know is that we can never satisfy all the people around us. There are deem to be some people who is not satisfy with our decision. So what to do? We can just close an eye and open an eye in facing this. Be ourselves and get over with this few weeks in the happiest possible way!

Thursday, August 28, 2014

Don't Worry, Be Happy!

Thursday once more and this means that the weekend is just about to arrive in a few moments time. This weekend I am gonna spend my weekend with a weekend getaway from KK. Keningau, here we go! A camp which I gave excuse of not going every year as it always bump with the school holidays! This time there's no more excuse. This is a church camp(Kem Barnabas) I must attend to no matter what happen. I could not care much more as this is my once and only last chance already! So, Allen, Let's Do It! 

Although there are many works to deal with nowadays, I guess I can still be grateful that I am physically ok with the surrounding. Thanks God I am not sick and still can deal with the things with the help of my friends. Though not all have the same head with me, but the things are being settled one by one eventually. With this, the time eventually pass by swifter than we realize. Now I can tell myself that there are 85 more to go here! And in another 16 more days, I need to temporarily leave here for a week. So, one quote for you all before I end here~~ Don't worry, be happy! The World won't stop turning because of one small problem of yours! 

Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Time + Friends = Everything!

A few weeks have passed by since my last step at my beloved home. In 2 weeks plus time, I will be back once more. Counting down the time to be back at home has been my favorite pastime here. It just bring me so much pleasure! Been through 2 days of "Kursus Kewangan" for yesterday and today. I did learn a lot of things such as budgeting, insurance, money management and etc. Although I am not so into these kind of course but it's still not so bad as time pass by even swifter with their presence.

A lot of things to handle these days as the class monitor for the final semester. I did not really expect it to be like this. How to manage 21 heads in the class? I am just a normal human being and I cannot make everyone in the class happy. So, in the end, I can just say good luck to a few and sorry to the other few. Anyway, just leave the unhappiness to God and He will know how to guide me! I still have lots of other works to come. For instance, assignments, action research, projects, presentations, interview and not forgetting the coming weekend's church camp! Can't wait for the much waited camp, Barnabas Camp! I even give up the chance to join my friend for an international trip for this camp! Huhu...>.<!!

We will surely be quite upset if some beloved things of us got broken or damaged. Recently, my 2 years and 7 months old printer got sick and I can no longer print using it dy. My mood was indeed affected and luckily it can still be repaired when I send to the printer shop today for service! Thank God for that! So, in life we should always appreciate all the things or people surrounding us at all time. Do not ever regret when it's all over or during the time when you do not have the chance to meet each other anymore. No one is gonna give you another second chance if you yourself do not even want to help yourself! Have a nice day everybody!

Thursday, August 21, 2014

Let It Be! Come on Allen!

Not everything goes to plan all the time. We can always complain that why the reality is so cruel and why is it so not into our hand. So what about trying to solve the problem using a plan B rather than complaining all the time. Time is gold and we don't have the greatest of time to achieve what we have planned all along with the duration of our beloved life. All we can do is try and try and try again in order to get what we wanted. This in the end may probably give us the happiness which we have been seeking all along.

Even minor stuffs can make one laugh till crazy. For instance, we were just sitting in the classroom like normal days and then suddenly someone came up with a topic on animal. I only know that cats can be gay too today. I laughed my heart out as never in my life I can ever imagine that this can happen. So now I realize that not only human can be gay but animals too. Oh my! Where have I been all along?

The weather nowadays are kinda good and is just fine for hibernating. Yet, I have taken some time off to do some of my works first before I actually hibernate on my beloved bed. Today I declare off day for myself after suffering from pain for my whole body. Tomorrow I shall continue to fight once more. This is it. A target shall always remain a target. Nothing can stop me! Come on Allen.

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Motivations In Doing Something We Do Not Believe!

The Motivation Can Be Found here! Lol..
Ok, to start of this post, I shall say hi to all my dear friends. It's been a while since my last feel to write arise from my mind. It's just hard when we do not have the real motivation to do something. We always need some pushes in our life to do something. We change because of the stimulus which are situated deep in our heart. We do not simply change. As we all know, we human are sometimes kinda stubborn. We may get used to be who we are and not tend to listen to the others. It's indeed hard but if we do not give it a try, who can guarantee you that you would fail.

How the Size Changes Over the years...
So, after trying it and all we get are just failures, what should we do then? Give up and stop trying. For me, I will choose that path but with a little bit add on. I will stop for a while and reflect back what have I actually done wrong. What was the problem and can that be overcome? That's how life should be. If we keep on trying and trying without reflecting, there must be something wrong and we are with our stubborn mind once more. Good luck for that and I can only say may God bless you.

Goodbye for Now!
I have been trying to do something for a long time. Been avoiding it for whatsoever reason and I never manage to do it real. So this time I am doing it for real. I need to do it. Have been receiving quite a lot of noises from others and this is really annoying. This in the end turn out to be my motivation to change. To do need I need to bite own tongue to change. The determination to do this is like the whole Empire States Building is being burn right now. So, let's all see the changes in 3 months.

The Road Can be long but never give up!
5 rounds a day, 20 push ups, 30 sit ups, 10 seconds plank! Are these too much? Maybe ya. But I can just hope that I can maintain doing this. I do admit that it's kinda tiring but nothing can stop me now. Think of what can I get after 3 months. That's it. I am doing it. So everybody please wish me luck ya. Goodbye and I shall update my progress from time to time.

Friday, May 23, 2014

Half A Decade. Long or Not Long?

Well, as I have promised my friends before the holiday ends last few days for this post, here I m now. It's been a pretty long course for me to take, isn't it? The whole duration is for 5.5 years and now 5 years has gone by. Half a decade of my life was filled with the excitement, joy, tears, sweat and etc of being a trainee teacher. From the first semester of foundation till now the end of the seventh semester of degree, we have all went through a long long way indeed.

Next semester we are into our final semester in the institute which we call by IPG Kampus Gaya. No matter how was the treatment which we got, the way they deal with stuffs, the ridiculous ideas, the this and that which we felt are quite insane, we must never forget that this was the place which gave us the chance to pursue our degree. Without the help of the lecturers here, we are all nobody to anyone else. So, why not give a round applause as a token of appreciation to our beloved lecturers.

We should never forget our own root no matter how much success we have gone in life. Remember that and we shall be a much better person in life! Come on. I have a few photos below this and there are not much to talk about actually. I will let the caption speak for themselves.

The first semester in Gaya. How time flies.

The Labuan Trip in the first semester. The body shape was!

The Manukan Trip in the second semester. Unplanned trip during study week.

The first full attendance of class outing! 

Thanks to my classmates for supporting me during the Pesta Tanglung!

Some crazy crazy stuff we used to do before.

The trip to Ranau was just purely awesome!

So, this is it people for the life in foundation. The next few semesters will follow in the days to come. Anyway, good day, people! Happy Holidays!

Saturday, March 15, 2014

Reflection For The First Quarter Of Year 2014!

Sometimes the heart just won't dare to accept the fact that some things have happened and there's no turning back. That's how humans' works like. We always like to think of what if this and that can be. But then, come to think of it, how many years of regret can we live in? Before we realize it, we are already near to the second half of the third decade of our life. What we must know and be sure of is why are we doing the things we are doing now, what is going on at the surrounding, who is the right people around us and etc.

2014 has so far been quite a normal n peaceful year for me up until this moment. However, there are still a long way to go before we are gonna end it. And it's up to us to determine if it's gonna be a meaningful year for all of us. This semester has been a quite swift one to pass by. Without realizing, next week is gonna be my eighth week at SK.Kionsom. 5 more weeks to go before I end it once and for all. It's started with a bang, then got lower and lower, and in the end we have arrived to end of week 7. Wow. Good news or not, you tell me.

Other than that, I am proud to announce that we are gonna hand in our final assignment for the semester next week before we go off for our long-awaited one week holiday. Yeah, after all the hustle and bustle in the city, finally I can give myself some time to switch off completely. I am going back home and I can do whatever I want! 

This is life. We are the one who give the answer to how our life can be deal with. No one can answer that other than ourselves. Some of my friends might have worked for a few years dy, some might just graduate and just started working for a few months, some might still be sitting at the home waiting for their job to come, some might still be studying and hoping to grad as soon as possible and some might just be doing something we don't know.

So, all in all, what I wanna tell all of us is that no matter what we do all the time, make sure we know what we are doing. There must be a reason why we are doing something at all times. It's a weekend and I will surely enjoy tonight. Movie night, then Chelsea once more! Oh yeah, have a nice weekend ahead of all of you ya! Love you all!^^ 

Thursday, March 13, 2014

9 Days to Mars! Haha...^^

9 more days to go...9 more days to a complete freedom at home... I can do whatever I want to do. No one can force me or ask me to do something which I dislike. I shall do no assignments, no lesson plans, no teaching aids and no tuition. This one week shall be a very much waited and precious one week of holiday which I have long waited for it to arrive. Somehow the hectic life here is really getting into my mind and I dun really have a time to enjoy how my surrounding are beginning to evolve day by day.

Saturday, March 8, 2014

Just Ain't The Same No More!

Just ain't the same no more, yeah, everything is just ain't the same no more. It's a typical Saturday n yet I m just staying in this hostel for the whole afternoon thinking of the draft for the proposal which I need to show my lecturer this coming Monday. To be exact, I thought of it even when I was taking a supposed to be short nap of mine. I ended up sleeping for 3 long hours. Maybe I was just too tired for the past few weeks and never actually have a really nice sleep.

All I can look forward to is the one week holiday coming soon in 2 weeks time. All this practicum thing really make me feel so uneasy, the teaching aids, the lesson plans and most of all the action research I need to plan. Somehow I feel like I have been doing these things over and over again! It's like non-stop to me. So that one week is really the best and most suitable time for me to pause for a while and do more relaxing thing in order to make me feel better of this final year.

Well, talking about just ain't the same no more. Life has been so different for me this year, I tried going for tuition and try to earn some hard earned money. Things has been so far so good as I only need to cover one more assignment after this which is the action research's proposal which I have mentioned above. I am not outside having fun on a normal Saturday afternoon till night, I am still in my room wondering when can I have my dinner.

But one thing is never gonna change, which is my support for Chelsea. I am gonna catch every match they play including tonight's 1.30am's match. I know it's kinda early but as a loyal fan, what to do? So while dinner is not served yet, I might as well do some of my works until it finally arrive. So until then, have a nice weekend ahead of all of you all ya. Good day! See ya all again soon!^^

Sunday, March 2, 2014

Do Your Part!

I couldn't care much of how you work, how many time you spend in doing something or whatsoever things are actually in your mind right here right now. All you need to do is DO YOUR PART! Do remember what comes first before everything else. Some might need time to pray to God first, some might need to catch some series before start working, some do this and do that but all I request for you is finish the task given to you and in the end you are happy, I am happy and everyone else shall be happy too! 

This time of the year is usually the busiest period of the year and I am here blogging about stuffs which are all becoming "rojak" in my mind. What I know now is assignment, assignment, assignment which I need to hand in this coming Tuesday! Which is in 2 days the same time, I have an observation from my Malay teacher at school tomorrow. After that, I will have to finish the lesson plan for the week. How come so many things coming at one go? Without forgetting proposal, another assignment. Observations? Still too many to settle.

Before everything else, I would like to say how thankful I am to still be alive here and blogging all these stuffs. Let's just hope that the next 9 months can pass by as swiftly as possible. I wanna get myself graduate just like so many people surrounding me. Some even got married dy, yet I am still here for my 5.5 years course which seems like endless! So everyone please wish me luck! Another 3 weeks more to the mid-term holiday! So, Sibu please wait patiently ya!^^ Got to go guys and gals..till we meet again next time! Good day...

To Continue Or Not

The best part of something is when you finally know that you have achieve success in something. This time around I have done quite a lot of...